Recently, I was telling a friend that Matt and I never really dated. She laughed at me and said, “What? You just got married?”

What I meant was that we didn’t really go on dates. Matt just kind of attached himself to me and would invite himself along to wherever I was going. Of course, we were in college so a lot of the time, it also meant that Matt would just sit down next to me in the dorm cafeteria or on the lawn in early fall to enjoy the weather. I’m sure I was also inclined to stop and talk to him when I saw him because he made it so easy.

After we were a couple, I learned that all along Matt was using his strategy to “reel me in.” He told me that in high school, his best friend and he had discovered a very successful way to attract women. He would approach a girl and be very friendly, talking her up (“macking” as I learned the term from Matt), and generally giving her a lot of attention. Then he would withdraw that attention. Nine times out of ten, the girl when then come after him. I wouldn’t say I ever went after Matt, but it was so easy to talk and be with him that it was natural to progress from friendship to dating. And he always made me laugh.


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